BIBLE SHOCKER! A bombshell discovery in an ancient cave in the middle east may result in a rewriting of the entire first chapter of the Bible, says experts.
Following a map drawn in a Dead Sea-like school found weeks an old tomb in cave on a hillside two humans created by God – and DNA tests reveal they were both MEN!
And in another explosive revelation, the ancient scroll reveals that Eve did NOT give Adam the apple and is not to blame for their being expelled from the Garden of Eden
The scientists say their ground-breaking discovery of the tomb proves – definitely – that Adam and Ed are the first humans, created 10,000 years ago.
Eve was formed later after the Almighty realized he’d made a gigantic goof, says Dr. Gustav Von Ibson, who headed the team that discovered the tomb and scroll.
“According to the scroll containing the map that led us to the bodies, God was exhausted after the sixth day after creating the earth and all the creatures on it,” says Von Ibson, head of antiquities at the University of Copenhagen in Denmark.
“He apparently lost his focus after creating Adam, so when he decided to give him a companion, he accidentally created another man, Ed, from Adam’s rib.
“When he realized that there was no mate for Adam to procreate with to create more humans to populate the earth, God created Eve – but the scroll does not say from what.”
This caused the first love triangle and a horrible mess, says Von Ibson.
“Since Ed was made from Adam’s rib and was around before Eve, Adam took a tremendous shine to him.”
“He actually preferred Ed to Eve and refused to cozy up to her.”
The tug of love between Ed and Eve continued with Adam as the prize. Both began wooing him with gifts.
Meanwhile, Bible expert Dr. Paul Mayor of England’s Liverpool University say it will be “a cold day in hell” before he and other scholars accept the discovery as legitimate. “Get real, those skeletons don’t prove anything.” Says Mayor. “Where are the penises”.
BTW, if you believe this story, you would be perfect as a Trump follower!
